I really like this blog post: When It’s Time to Just Say No.
I recently joined a morning Bible study–biweekly–and it was a really big decision for me, one I’d never had to make before because we didn’t have a car and so I was “stuck” at home. And I struggled pretty deeply over what this two-hours-every-other-week would mean for my kids. I don’t like putting them in nursery; I’d be much happier if everyone met in a giant room and the kids could play in the background while the moms fellowshipped and studied. Since that isn’t the format, though, I had to think though the implications of putting them in the nursery, away from Mommy (and Mommy away from her first job as homemaker).
After talking to Seth, I decided to give it a shot. I hope it will be good for the girls to have some exposure to kids near their age, and two hours every other week doesn’t sound like an unreasonable amount of time. Maybe they’ll start learning about social expectations and obeying adults other than us! At any rate, E seemed to enjoy it, and R clearly wasn’t traumatized–although when I came back after the study, the girls were standing (just standing), right next to each other, doing absolutely nothing besides silently watching the other kids!
And for me, it’s mainly about trying to be involved with church. I feel like there are a lot of activities that I can’t be a part of, because of our home responsibilities, and so I’m sure it seems to many people that we’re “fringe” people. But our biggest problem is that our kids go to bed waaaay early and everything goes haywire if they can’t. So when the study came up, and it’s during the day and minimally disruptive to our home, it seemed good to participate.
But my point here is that it wasn’t a decision I made lightly. I was really concerned about the impact it would have on my first responsibility as a homemaker and mother, which is the whole point of the post I linked above, although for her family and home, she decided it wasn’t good to do a very similar outside activity. I think our morning starts very early, comparatively, and so it is neither hard to get out the door on time, nor does it blow our whole day–we have a nice long morning far before 9:30 ever rolls around!
I couldn’t agree more with the author, though, that it all boils down to making intentional choices about the ways we spend our time, especially our time outside the home. I’m learning that a lot of life in general, actually, boils down to being intentional and purposeful–this is just one more little area.